And.. I'm back again for a quick blurp!

It was a random day and suddenly i thought of reminding myself about my feelings and thoughts presently. Its been ages since i last had my verbal vomits or shared my epiphanies. Looking back once again on my other post dedicated for my ex, GOSH! i was really inspired! I love how i could pen down my thoughts at that moment to capture that emotion. I think it really does speak volumes. Perhaps even more that how a picture speaks a thousand words? 

I love how i can "re-live" and "re-feel" such a special part of my life. Even the icky nasty bits. Somehow having such a recap gives me better insight and in a odd way i kinda learn from myself? or rather my experiences. I also get to go.. "Awww..that was so sweet"... and "Eww.. I did that Eh?" 

I remember having a couple of tunes played at the background to get me in the mood to type without stopping to think whats the next sentence. This feeling of regardless-ness and casualness is so enduring. Which brings me to wonder what i song was playing when i read that entry!!

Btw, Corrine May's 24hours is playing on the background now. Its labour day and i did NOTHING! yes.. the beauty of nua-ing.. Odd that i always resist this Nua-ing time. As i grow into lady-hood, i realise how precious nua time is. Sometimes its amazing how much work women have to do to keep their youth! Oouh! That constant battle. lol..

I like how things have evolved in my life. If my life was a movie.. I'd think my ratings were pretty decent! I may not fulfill the action and thriller or girly pop chick genre but i think my experiences arent just boring and simple. 

Sure there are curve-balls and the regular stressors but there were several snippets of the simple pleasures and the heart warming moments. Every year seems like a new chapter.. this story and movie will only get better! 

I'll be sure to think of blogging again when such a moment where i am filled with emotion and bursting occurs. Till then i'm leaving with a to be continued dangling carrot stick to entice you further into this story.. Adieu~~

Complaints of a very deprived child!

I cant believe i made breakfast. For the devil.

This is why family dynamics fall into place. I cant help being so careful in my choices for a LIFE long partner. Really its .. not a business partner where you can just split the shares of the company and just go separate ways.

LIFE LONG. Kinda means for better or for worst. And in this case, its worse. Awful and Annoyingly WORST. Blame my possible exageration and biasness on violent Tv and lack of MAJOR communication.

Parents. Insist on principles and set cultures for how you want to build up your own personalised family~ (Whippie! with a tad of sarcasm) You wont believe it but its so dang important to have these values. Even harder to keep it going as your kids grow up. ( Good luck with that)

Kids. Just do the right thing. Whatever makes sense to you and try our best to be independent against society. If your parents teach you well. Instilling values and what nots. Good for you. If not. You'll still live. Just maybe if your lucky you get to realize when you reach a certain age you can set your own values and thereafter continue to live by them.

Why cant people just do their roles well. Suck it up and be a MOM and DAD. I get the whole crap about eveyone is kinda not trained for the job. But Gosh.. What happens to self help books and other "EXTRA enrichment classes".

KIds when you grow up and BEFORE! you have kids of your own. See Parent Guide 101 and my little blurp above.

Good luck and Good life peeps.

Wants to be more girly!

I realised i havent used my girly powers that much. Being prissy and screaming EEEEKK.. Dirt. Fussing over tiny bugs and becoming a freak about uber cute things or anything that is pink.

Years of fighting the reality of the weaker sex and femininity didnt do me too much. I shall.. embrace! EMBRACE the Pinkness and Cuteness and all that comes with.

My Mantra so far= Individualistic Beauty with a tough slab of femininity.

Urge to Blog

Feeling a BIg urge to blog. But am not in the emo mood to reminisce. I'm feeling awfullytickled. Just want to post nice nice Arty Farty random Pictures to Decorate my entry. I decided to type in a few funky words and google image it and this is what i found.

Word: Peace

Picture Taken from here

Word: Boredom

Picture taken from here

Word: Elated

Picture taken from Here

Sorting out the obvious..

I got to get my life back in order again!!

My priorities are so messed up. =(

Procrastination is eating me inside... No more other people first.. ME ME ME! First.. Sigh.. I'm in my save the world traps again. You know how the air plane people always give instructions to parents(esp. Mums) to put on your mask first in an emergency before assisting your child t put his/hers on. THERE IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO DO THAT! Crazy as it sounds... This blog to posted to constantly remind me again and again whenever i fall into this state of absolute to PICK MYSELF UP AGAIN!! =)

If i want to save the world.. I got to save me first=)

Uurgh.. I dunt like it that i'm impossibly bluntly right.

I'm gonna be smelling like daisies..

Smelling Great.. with the Bathed in Vanilla and forever with the trail of daisies scent..

Love this.

Today's Daily Bread

I like today's Daily Bread. Titled:

The Slowness Of Wisdom

When the Pharisees came to Jesus with the woman caught in adultery and asked Him what should be done with her, He knelt for a moment and scribbled in the sand (John 8:6-11). We have no idea what He wrote. But when they continued asking Him, Jesus responded in one short sentence: “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first” (v.7). His few words accomplished much in confronting the Pharisees with their own sin, for they walked away one by one. Even today those words resound around the world.

Jesus had such a closeness to and dependence on His Father that He said of Himself, “Whatever I speak, just as the Father has told Me, so I speak” (12:50). Oh, that we had such a relationship with our Father that we knew how to respond with His wisdom!

Perhaps it begins with obeying James’ challenge to be “swift to hear, slow to speak” (1:19). This is not the slowness of ignorance, emptiness, timidity, guilt, or shame. But the slowness of wisdom born of dwelling quietly on the Lord and His thoughts.

We’re often told to stop and think before we speak. But I think we should take it much further and live a life where we’re always listening for God’s wisdom.

Lord, grant that we may hear You speak;
For truth within our hearts we seek;
For unto Christ we would be true
And know what He Himself would do. —D. De Haan

Listen to God before you speak for God.

AMEN AMEN AMEN...

Golden Opportunity

Been thinking about the opportunities that are presented

to me recently. I cant help but think that this is God's test for me. Another personally created little obstacle that he knows i'll have a hard time completing. To many it may be a obvious choice to make. But its dang tough kay!

Golden Opportunities are hard to come by.. saying no to neither is like .. this picture below..

Its not everyday u get opportunities knocking by. I also dunt want to be the silly girl that is in trouble and prays and when God sends so much help in different forms and don't take it cause she was waiting for some dramatic entrance from GOD himself.. then ends up getting a earful from him instead.

Signs like seeing a random guy's shirt spelling out Holiday in Carins Australia and random things like seeing the book in the arts section titled: Going to Live in Australia Guide.. A random taxi's advertisement about Australia.

Maybe i'm not seeing signs that want me to stay in SG big enough. Maybe i'm just blinding them out. Of course i've received endearing looks from the people closest to me. And of course i think the biggest pull is a New job offer in Sg. This new position gives me the scope to help other people communicate better which i enjoy btw and brings me closer to my goal of consulting and educating.

I bet there are people already getting their slippers out wanting to smack me. *hold that though* Dont think i am oblivious to the fact that i'm dang lucky. Seeeee... told u its a different kinda obstacle. Most times if things are sucky my optimism kicks in and i suck it up.. and live it. But when too good a thing comes by.. or rather when choices are tough. It becomes a stumbling block. Uurgh! I know i should be thinking hard about the pros and cons. Dont think i haven't sub consciously. Thinking is easy for me.. Trusting an having faith is the tough bit. I think thats wad i need to learn man..

So i'm concluding... I'm not going to THINK about it.. I'm Gonna Pray about it truthfully and sincerely and madly Pray. And do other things to keep my mind occupied. Which lead me to having this crazy idea which i think i should share with Rev Goh. I found what i can do to serve God. =) Dunno if she is in consensus with my idea but hey.. i'll ask anyways.. very most i'll get rejected.

Feel Good Cry

Feel Good Cry is dang good. With a shoulder to cry on would be better though =)

Just thinking about that makes me feel sane again. And also reminds me the importance and comfort in sharing my thoughts and burdens with God and his favourite people.

Korean influence

Taken from a very smart cartoon website

Koreans guys are uber cute! There .. i said it.. ahah.. I know of too many that will agree. Mum would be the first to jump up and agree. Mum's been snooping around again with her concerned look asking if i have anyone that i like. I think she is feeling abit torn again about me leaving. She 's maybe having withdrawal syndrome again-Its her style. Its a cycle. She gets all excited about my new career path and opportunity.. then when it sinks in that i need to leave for Aussie, she feels that pang of sadness but rubs it away in exchange for a Its-for-her-own-good-and-its-a-good-experience thoughts. Then.. the thought of me actually leaving.. sinks in and gets to her the hard way and thus withdrawal syndrome. There is a up side to this and here it is- After waddling in that stage she gets uber happy when i do .. do well and get settled and she feels .. YES! completed one childs journey.. look at how she's grown.. then she goes and pat herself on the back and goes.. well done self!

Stages of change.... AMazing isnt it. Mum's awesome that way. I am crossing my fingers and hoping i get the same neurotic mum like nurturing technics that will drive my children crazy when i grow up! So fun!

Scared Silly and Mad Crazy

Probably the biggest decision i have independently made yet.

All that talk about you only live once...

...and that opportunity rarely knocks twice-cherish it..

...and that Luck is what happens when opportunity meets preparation. ..

...ARE TRUE.

As i go nearer and nearer to the a new career path..

I feel like i am further and further away from home.

But then there is God's Plan for you and all.. So really the opportunity is just God given. Isnt it?

Daughters..

Been Feeling the Ups and Downs with turbulence much too frequently recently. Beginning to wonder and experience the true meaning of living happily. Much to my dismay, its not the kind of lifestyle i am having now. Just like a flu. I'm sure i'll recover after coming to my senses.

This Book's title is good enough for me to buy it for SAM when he gets pretty daughters.

This song is playing in my mind now. Daughters have such a tough life really. Applause Please!

Daughters by John Mayer

I know a girl
She puts the color inside of my world
But she's just like a maze
Where all of the walls are continually changed
And I've done all I canTo stand on her steps with my heart in my hands
Now I'm starting to see
Maybe it's got nothing to do with me

Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too
Oh, you see that skin?
It's the same she's been standing in
Since the day she saw him walking away
Now I'm left
Cleaning up the mess he made

So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you doGirls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Boys, you can break
You'll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong
And boys soldier onBut boys would be gone without the warmth from
A womans good, good heart

On behalf of every man
Looking out for every girl
You are the guide and the weight of her world
So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too [x3]

Epiphany alert!

When i want something bad enough.

Take the first plunge into the water.

Then badly start swimming towards the goal. Just keep trying.

Eventually, I'll reach the other side. =)

Now the Plunge. Thats the biggest huddle. I shouldn't be such a WUSS. Right?!

If there were only a pill to be braver!

Afraid of Uncertainty... NOT!

Jesus is the coolest really!

You know i've been reading matthew in the bible recently and in alot of parables Jesus is scolding the deciples that they have little faith. Sometimes, i think we really should be scolded for our lack of faith. I often wish i was braver to overcome all the little problems in my life.

My constant self reminder:

When i get thoroughly drained.

-To pray.. and oddly enough get peace within me and get more energy.

When frustration sets in and the situation is too sticky for me to handle.

-To pray for Calmness and Wisdom to solve

When i feel stuck and lost

-To pray for a push in the right direction

When all odds are against me and i feel stuck in a pressure cooker

-To pray to not use harsh words and have patience that things will unravel to be better.

Just as i feel kinda lost, the daily bread today was talking about HOPE. (See! Its not luck or coincidence... Its planned HE knows you and knows what you need when you need it. =))

Many claim to have hope, but only those whose hope is Christ can claim it with certainty. Hope comes not from strength, intelligence, or favorable circumstances, but from the Lord. As Maker of heaven and earth, He alone has the right to promise hope and the power to keep the promise.- taken from Daily Bread RBC

"The Lord has promised good to me.

His word my hope secures.

He will my shield and portion be,

As long as life endures." -snippets from the song Amazing Grace.

POsitivity Pass it on!

Taken from http://dailykindness.net

————————————————————————-

Use Empowering Words When You Talk to Yourself, (whether you are speaking out loud or silently)

How do you talk to yourself?

Do you use the words “can’t”, “won’t”, “don’t need to”, “why try”? Many people do.

Do you find that what you say to yourself turns out to be true? Why is this?

You see your brain is like a computer that you feed each day. It doesn’t always know what’s real or not unless you tell it.

Example: If someone you love has hurt you, you may tell yourself that all people who love you will probably hurt you too. You may not even be aware that you are doing this.

Your brain just files this information for reference, it’s data, little zeroes and ones and no column that asks “true or not true?” Now your brain thinks, based on what you told it, that everyone you’ll ever love will hurt you. At the very least it is using this data in its assessment of future situations.

Now, what if we instead told our brain:

“Okay this person ripped my heart out – but that’s only one person. I’m lovable and have many loving people in my life who are not out to hurt me. I know that the right people are coming into my life all the time. If someone hurts me, I will forgive them and bless them on their way.”

Words can be empowering.

I can

I love to

I want to

I will

I must

I am

We can attain a greater quality of life if we feed ourselves empowering words and practice saying them until they become a habit.

I know first hand that it takes time. And I also know that it’s worth it.

Try it for a week. Catch yourself saying, “I can’t”, when you don’t really mean it and instead try, “I can”, and see how you think and feel about yourself.

Remember, the words you use to empower yourself will have a lasting effect, only if you practice

them and they become a habit (an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary).

They say it takes at least 28 days to develop a habit. After a week, you will see that it becomes easier. It’s a mindset and you can control your thoughts. Be proactive and not reactive – give yourself some good words.

Dream big and empower yourself! Believe you can and you will.

Most of all, CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY!

Stream Of Praise (SOP)

I'm so glad to be saved!

Ever so thankful!

I didnt go to church last sunday. And i am feeling abit unsettled. Its like something's missing. I miss worshipping with the youths. Going on Sunday reminds me of like a family meeting. Its such a warm fuzzy feeling.

After reaching home. I hit the lappie for Holy songs. Did my own worshipping ahha.. and Quiet time. I'm so thankful to go for the SOP concert. Oddly enough.. I think.. i'm beginning to rely even more and more on HIM. Cause i'm crying more and more while worshiping ahaha.. I normally hold tears back. I think its also cause i feel that i am in Blame it on pride and insecurities, I'm so glad i can rely on HIM. I used to rely on certain people for security and re assurance, sometimes its just not enough. I get it even more now- why we need to get a spouse with the same religion. Keeping the faith together, Trusting God with path, Relying on him and having similar thoughts about raising a family.

After meeting the gang at jurong i was uber tired. But somehow i decided to go to SOP on sat instead when wk smsed. Initially was intended to go on sunday after church sessions. So glad i went on Sat. I think God planned it oddly enough. After what happened that day i cant help but let out a chuckle and go.. "God u already know this is going to happen right!"

Anyways... i went.. saved hamsters from suffocating in wk's car.. Haha.. I was thinking if God didnt place me there. Then wk's car wont have started. If i wasnt there to call for the other angel's daddy for help. If i wasnt there then i wouldnt have went into the "mama shop" and met this indian family who volunteered to drive us to get brake petrol and also by the way are christians form the same church we just left.

So fortunate to be there on saturday.. to experience his love for us when we are in difficult situations. Its so amazing really yeah? Very Miao4! I like when he uses me for these things makes me feel really important and i appreciate him using me especially when i am such a young and Ahem.. Blur christian.

I feel like everything is fast forwarding when this year after accepting christ. For some reason i am able to experience so much of his love and its becoming more and more transparent to me. Its no longer luck and coincidence. Its transformed into planned and reliance. And because he is so extra nice to me.. i also want to be extra nice to him. Haha.. God's cute that way.

But really sometimes i wish he could just tell us his plan. But hey! knowing it through an experience and through lessons is'nt that bad. Afterall, its a eventually thing since its all planned anyways yeah?! Read in the bible that God gives us all many gifts. Even though sometimes we are envious of others gift. I'm confident that he has given me all i need. I'm thoroughly thankful for the always cheerful and positive mindset he has injected in me and the madly nurturing nature he has carefully placed in me.

The glass is half full mentality

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.

- Groucho Marx

My Stubborn streak.. Lost!

I think my opportunity has slipped away and maybe god planned for a diversion after silly me not accepting his hints.. after 3 times!

On a happier note. Stubborn as God know i am. He forced me into relying on him once again on friday. Haha.. Prayer does work! I'm glad i leaned on God's shoulder that day. =)

Today's Daily Bread:

Have setbacks slowed you down to a snail’s pace? Be encouraged. God doesn’t ask for a fast finish. He expects persevering progress.

When trials intrude to slow down your life,
It would be easy for you to give in;
But by perseverance you’ll overcome strife,
So just keep on plodding—with Christ you can win. —Branon

Great achievement requires great perseverance.

Anthropology Vs Psychology

Anthropology is the study of humanity.

Psychology is a science, an academic, and applied discipline that involves the scientific study of human or animal mental functions and behaviors.

On the latest Channel five episode of Bones. Dr Brennen disagreed with Anthropology logic of what the Alpha Male's(Aka Top Dog) theory. She took a emotional and less evidence based view. Long story short. Agent Booth is slowly influencing Dr Brennen to feel more. At the bus stop after a "sibling linked to dad-was-an-alcoholic problem" Dr Brennen came out innocently asking if Agent Booth needed some time and space. Agent Booth had those longing eyes when he told her JUST time. So she sat down beside him. Agent booth being the family oriented tight lipped-do-anything-for-your-family-and-suffer-in-silence-type said.." My Dad.. he was an alcoholic."

Toooucching yeah!

Its amazing moments like this that make me feel... UUrgh! I want this! I want this amazing bond! I cant wait to be unravelled by a Dr Brennen.

Booth and Bones Video. Loves!

Unbelievable!

I have not had so many deep sighs in 3 days. I wish i had more patience but its pulling my hair out literally. Wish i had a bigger heart and a smaller ego. I just had a epiphany again. Its easier to forgive a friend then forgive a family member. Maybe cause the hurt isn't so deep.

Today's QT:

So often we think only of money when the Bible calls us to give willingly and bountifully, “for God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Cor. 9:7). Giving others a chance and offering hospitality to those who hurt is generosity that makes winners of everyone involved.

The gifts that we may give,
The deeds that we may do,
Most truly honor Christ
When self is given too. —D. De Haan

The manner of giving shows the character of the giver more than the gift itself.